I agree, I haven 't written anything political as yet, something like I can have a discussion forum on. In fact I still consider myself a Blog-virgin!
I've always shared about the war fares I've been through in my life and this one's no different.
I know you are fed up of reading articles that talk about "How to spice up your relationship" and you've scored really good in those quizzes that test you on "What kind of a life-partner are you" and that is exactly why I came up with these seven add-ons that won't really teach you anything about relationships but surely would do great to leave you relationship at a standpoint where you could bet against a newly-made-luvey-duvey relationship!
1. Be yourself:
Most of us pretend to have same likes and dislikes while we're dating a person so that you connect well while the dinner. Do we ever think of connecting well in a longer term? WHAM! There we go! We date more often, and sometimes land up in a relationship. Downstream in the relationship, we start facing confrontations about the choice mis-match. The legendary phrase, "Honey, you've changed so much" haunts us day and night!
Being yourself is definitely the strongest base of any relationship. Tell your partner what you like and what you dislike, your priorities in life and the plans you have for yourself. You might just have to wait for your "Perfect Match" here, but sure you wouldn't want to be called a guy/girl hopper!
While your heart finds its "Perfect Match" let your soul relish its "Singledom"!
2. Give him/her his space:
Each one of us love the madness of love and being in a relationship but equally hate it when we receive a sms saying, "Hw mch do u miss me baby" seven times a day, during work, while we are in an ATM, while we are in a trial-room- at- a- mall- trying -to- fit- in -a -sexy- dress- zipping- it, while we are sweating it out in a queue outside a PVR etc.
Personal space is inevitably necessary for every person 16 to 60, single to an open relationship!
And "giving" this space doesn't mean calling only five times a day instead of six!
Try organising a only-guys-night-out for your guy and trust me your guy will love you more for it. Guys have much more than "How hot is that next-door-chick" to talk about at a night-out, gizmo, bikes, cars, PlayStations.
Watch out for his way of making it up to you the next day!!!
And for all you guys, who are waiting for their advice over this...Try planning an all-day-long-girls-shopping-spree for your girl, or a day at the spa. She would never ask you the reason behind your past break-ups!
While your girl is at the spa or the mall, why don't you download the new-much-awaited-version of NFS!
3. Do not over-analyze:
Yes, we do! And that's the bitter truth. This is a Red Alert! Stop over-analyzing what he said and why he said so! We often have an empty mind space and end up thinking all the stuff like these and then day comes when you want "to talk" to your partner! I don't understand how does this day pops up suddenly!! I happen to watch this movie recently, "The Ugly Truth" and Gerard Butler(okay, girls stop those ahhhaas, listen to this first) says after much of a dating-no-commitment-no love-climax, " I love you, psycho" and Katherine Heigl hates him for using the word psycho...There she goes into the depths of over-analyzing. Out of the 3-most-lovable-words under the sun, why on earth would she notice the last word "psycho"!!!
And, that exactly is what I call over-analyzing. Be happy with what he/she says!
4. Take the lead, sometimes:
Nope, not the other way round, adult content is not permitted on my blog!
Sometimes, you should plan everything for both of you, like a weekend at the beach, or an evening at the rock concert, followed by a candle-light dinner, or even lazy laid-back Sunday at home with your favorite DVDs for that matter. It'll drive you to a passion to make it the best for both of you. At the end of the day, you two get some wonderful moments and a great day- Plus, great results, amazing moments and your partner-all-for-you for the person who took the lead!
So go ahead guys, google-search for new ideas!
5. The most difficult word- "NO":
I know we've always been taught not to say this word ever since we were born and said "NO" to milk! And that's what makes it the most difficult word to say.
A relationship is not always about "I miss you and I love you". There ain't always rainbows and butterflies... They also need some compromise!
And saying "No" does your work, at times when you had a hell of a day at work and all you want to do is go home and sit back and relax but your partner is all excited for the DJ night at the local nightclub... Obviously, you wouldn't want to go under pressure with your partner and yell at him at the end of the day telling all you did the whole day was under pressure!
Saying "NO" does your work here... But a plain "NO" would be so hated... You better take care of how you say it... Like, " Baby, I would love to go, in fact I was reading about it while at work, but my boss caught me surfing the net and loaded me with overtime. I don't wanna go in this condition 'cause I really wanna dance with you all night long-What about next Friday night, at the Enigma?"
6. The "S" word:
S-Sorry is the word I'm talking about here!
Always be the first one to apologise. Returns? Your partner feels sorry for his ego and you would never have to be the first one the next time!
A "Sorry" really bridges the gap between the two arguments and needs no hard work to do so!
7. The three shortest magical words- "I love you"
This would obviously be the first one, but not always! Make it a point to tell your partner at least once everyday, that you love him. It has been surveyed in America, that the couples said these magical words to their partner at least once a day had a longer relationship than the couples who didn't.
Who, amongst us, doesn't want to know how much you're being loved everyday...how much you're being missed everyday. Who, amongst us, doesn't love to be loved endlessly!
AV's Avilicious by Avanika Mote is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-No Derivative Works 2.5 India License.
2 comments:
truly said avi, i agree completely but as far as the 's' word is concerned, i think using it when one actually means it, works well otherwise frequent use of a word best describing an apology verbally would not mean that much and would in times seems to be fake. Supressing ego is easy if you are soft spoken, good listener and really sticks to what is right as far as relationships are concerned.
In all i would congratulate you for exploring your passion of blogging and bringing it out well. Keep up the flawless work and all the very best for your future. love ya.
Hey abhinav,
I completely agree with the thing you mentioned aout saying the s-word-sorry. Point noted!
Thanks for your true wishes and keep adding wisdom to this blog!
Cheers!
Avanika.
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